Zombie News

Most zombies eat flesh and generally cause misery for the living, however, some zombies can be quite handy to have around, some may even be fun.

*Be warned that if you haven’t seen the films mentioned then there may be spoilers in this article*

5. Billy Butcherson (Hocus Pocus)

Mouth sewn up and cursed by some silly witches - he has issues.

Good points: He will help you eventually and the ladies love him (so he could be a good wing man).

Bad points: He will chase you through sewers, he has bad breath, once his sewn up lips are open you’d wish you have an emergency sewing kit.

4. Gramps (House 2)

Digging up your great grandfather is never a good idea, so don't try this at home!

Good points: Gramps will regale you with stories of the old west, he will make you shed a tear, and he will share his ancient treasure with you.

Bad points: He will moan a lot, get you in trouble with the girlfriend, and the treasure he shared with you opens dimensions from where annoying bad guys will show up.

3. Fido (Fido)

A zombie butler – the new, must have gadget

Good points: He cooks, he cleans, he raises your social status, and he is loyal.

Bad points: He will eat the neighbours, tear your family apart, he smokes, and he will probably seduce your mother.

2. Bub (Day of the Dead)

Some zombies retain basic memories – maybe we can train them?

Good points: He is funny, he will call your aunt Alicia, he can shave, and most importantly he will go out of his way to get revenge for his master.

Bad points: Hard to train and you have to feed him...

1. Ed (Shaun of the dead)

Your current best mate but less annoying and tied up in a shed